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Paul Dale
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The Dark Lord's Handbook Kindle Edition

by Paul Dale (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.2 out of 5 stars 996 ratings
To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. The simple ambition to hold dominion over the world and bend all to your will sounds straightforward but it's not. There are armies to raise, fortresses to build, heroes to defeat, battles to be fought, hours of endless soliloquy in front of the mirror–it's a never-ending job. Not to mention deciding what to wear. (After hours, days, even weeks of consideration, it will be black.) After many spectacular failures, Evil decided to lend more than inspiration to these would be tyrants. He wrote an easy to follow Dark Lord's Handbook. And yet the next Dark Lord that came along screwed up like all the others. It had been hundreds of years, and the Handbook was lost in the annals of time, along with all that was mythic and exciting in the world. Then one day, a randy dragon had a chance encounter. Nine months later a Dark Lord was born. In time, the Handbook found its way to this new contender, Morden. To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. Morden had better be a quick study. --- The series is written as a humorous take on classic fantasy tropes, with a dash of satire thrown in for good measure. Of course, there are dragons, elves, orcs and that kind of thing. Big battles and such-like. It is epic fantasy after all. Volume 1 110,000 words
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  1. Book 1 of 3
    The Dark Lord's Handbook
  2. Print length
    322 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Accessibility
    Learn more
  5. Publication date
    2 Feb. 2012
  6. File size
    844 KB
  7. Page Flip
    Enabled
  8. Word Wise
    Enabled
  9. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Product description

About the Author

Paul Dale is the author of Il Libro Segreto del Signore Oscuro. He has a degree in physics from Bath University and a master's degree in creative writing from Bath Spa University. When he's not writing, he's cycling, which means he doesn't get much writing done. Paul lives in Bath, England.

With acting credits that span stage and screen, Gildart Jackson is most often recognized for his role as Gideon on Charmed. He has also been featured on Providence and General Hospital, and his theater roles include Trigorin in The Seagull, Henry Higgins in My Fair Lady, and Adrian in Private Eyes at the Old Globe.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B00756ZO4Y
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Paul Dale
  • Accessibility ‏ : ‎ Learn more
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ 2 Feb. 2012
  • Edition ‏ : ‎ 4th
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 844 KB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 322 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Book 1 of 3 ‏ : ‎ The Dark Lord's Handbook
  • Customer reviews:
    4.2 out of 5 stars 996 ratings

About the author

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Paul Dale

Paul Dale

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I live in Bath, England, a small city that traces its heritage back to Roman times-their hot spring baths can be visited in the city centre. It's a beautiful and much visited city. I count myself lucky to live here.

When I’m not writing, I’m cycling. With the Mendips to the south and the Cotswolds to the north, I spend much of my time on my bike struggling up hills before all too brief periods of descent.

Aside from that, I like to play games. Board games, computer games, card games. Any game really. Having being brought up on 8 bit pixel games, I find it incredible to spend time in VR with a friend killing zombies or playing golf,  running around fully realised fantasy worlds, or taking a Dash 8 across Norway in a simulator.

I studied Physics with Applied Physics at Bath University. Many years later, when I decided my writing needed a hand, I did a Master of Arts Degree in Creative Writing at Bath Spa University.

My work to date is a satirical fantasy trilogy, The Dark Lord's Handbook, and Artificial Intelligence Awakening.

The Dark Lord’s Handbook series sprung from the idea that even a Dark Lord has a mum and the nature of original sin — is anyone born completely evil? The trilogy is complete now and I have moved on to my other love after fantasy: science fiction.

Artificial Intelligence Awakening shares common DNA with the Dark Lord's Handbook in not following standard tropes. While I much admire and enjoy stories of man against machine, I have taken a different tack. There are great challenges ahead of us as the world changes driven by the ever quickening pace of technology. I hope this book contributes to the conversations we need to have when dealing with these challenges.

For readers of The Dark Lord's Handbook, Artificial Intelligence Awakening, while not lacking humour in places, is a more serious work.

Customer reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
996 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find this book entertaining with a cleverly woven plot and laugh-out-loud funny bits. Moreover, the writing style is well-executed, and customers appreciate the good characters and concept. However, the plot receives mixed reactions, with one customer noting it's predictably obvious.

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EnjoymentHumourReadabilityWriting styleCharacter developmentConceptPlot
19 customers mention ‘Enjoyment’19 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy this book, finding it entertaining with a good story, and one customer notes that the plot twists kick in at just the right times, while another describes it as a humorous fantasy romp.

"...A most exciting book from a very promising author. More please." Read more

"...The characters develop well, the narrative runs along at a good pace and the humour is intelligent rather than resorting to silliness or time..." Read more

"...Its nothing like it. Its a genuine story with good characters, plot, and real humour...." Read more

"A fairly enjoyable book, a little disappointing that it adheres to the cliches instead of breaking them...." Read more

19 customers mention ‘Humour’19 positive0 negative

Customers find the book humorous, describing it as a farce with laugh-out-loud funny bits, and one customer notes the author's clever use of irony.

"...This very funny book brings the angst of becoming a Dark Lord to the fore...." Read more

"...develop well, the narrative runs along at a good pace and the humour is intelligent rather than resorting to silliness or time travelling sprouts..." Read more

"...Its a genuine story with good characters, plot, and real humour...." Read more

"...No typos that I noticed but some laugh out loud funny bits and a deftly handled sexual tension between our hero, or at least, our dark lord, Morden..." Read more

18 customers mention ‘Readability’18 positive0 negative

Customers find the book readable, with one mentioning it's like reading LOTR.

"...A most exciting book from a very promising author. More please." Read more

"...Despite this it is a good story and worth a look." Read more

"...But all in all a damned good read which has left me waiting for another from him." Read more

"OMG I LOVE THIS BOOK SOOOOOO MUCH IT IS SO EPIC AND AWESOME AND JUST PLAIN COOL!..." Read more

9 customers mention ‘Writing style’9 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing style of the book, with one noting there are no typos.

"...No typos that I noticed but some laugh out loud funny bits and a deftly handled sexual tension between our hero, or at least, our dark lord, Morden..." Read more

"...original look at the ultimate struggle between good and evil with great writing! I will definitely read it again and would definitely recommend!" Read more

"...A Well written and witty first novel. Think Despicable Me meets Discworld...." Read more

"...Tolkein and Pratchett, but the author has his own style, which is very readable and enjoyable...." Read more

6 customers mention ‘Character development’6 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the character development in the book.

"...Morden is a wholy believable character, and his orcs are wonderfully created. A most exciting book from a very promising author. More please." Read more

"...The characters develop well, the narrative runs along at a good pace and the humour is intelligent rather than resorting to silliness or time..." Read more

"...Its nothing like it. Its a genuine story with good characters, plot, and real humour...." Read more

"...The characters are funny, well realised and written, and develop nicely as the books draws you in...." Read more

6 customers mention ‘Concept’6 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the concept of the book, with one noting its interesting points of view and another finding it mildly philosophical.

"...The "handbook" concept is good and is what drives the story even through you think there's a certain inevitability to it...." Read more

"...I thought it was a witty, smart, original look at the ultimate struggle between good and evil with great writing!..." Read more

"Conceptually it is a superb idea...." Read more

"...Funny, cynical, mildly philosophical, satirical and a rattling good yarn of good and evil and the only subtle differences between them." Read more

3 customers mention ‘Plot’0 positive3 negative

Customers have mixed opinions about the plot of the book, with one finding it predictable and another noting that the story often slips in and out, while one customer mentions an infuriating cliffhanger ending.

"...The core plot is obviously fairly predictable, but that's the whole point really, and it even makes fun of the fact...." Read more

"...However I do think it could have so much more. The story often slips in and out of banal storyline and then whips back into a great comedic..." Read more

"...I really enjoyed it and despite an infurating cliffhanger ending I loved it! Can't wait for the sequel, Thanks Paul for all your hard work!" Read more

Top reviews from United Kingdom

  • Nightwing ( your average dragon god )
    5.0 out of 5 stars A hand book of laughs
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 22 February 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Paul Dale takes us into a world where the Dark Lord has not even risen yet, not only that, but he still has to learn how to rise... then there is the small matter of what to wear, and whether he should simply pillage, or burn a city. This very funny book brings the angst of becoming a Dark Lord to the fore. Morden is a wholy believable character, and his orcs are wonderfully created.
    A most exciting book from a very promising author. More please.
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Gary Taylor
    4.0 out of 5 stars Impressive debut. A proper funny page-turner
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 August 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I'm not a hard-core fantasy addict - it took me ages to get through Lord of the Rings, I've read less than half of Pratchett's stuff and I struggled through a couple of Robert Rankin's - but I did enjoy reading this. The characters develop well, the narrative runs along at a good pace and the humour is intelligent rather than resorting to silliness or time travelling sprouts (looking at you, Mr Rankin). Orcs also feature a lot here, in a good way.

    The "handbook" concept is good and is what drives the story even through you think there's a certain inevitability to it. The plot twists kick in at just the right times and make sense. There's plenty of scope for further sequels and elaborating on the characters and world developed in this first book.

    I hope this becomes a popular debut and Mr Dale furnishes us with a sequel or two.
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  • Andrew
    5.0 out of 5 stars A great read
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 25 March 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I was a little bit worried that this might be a dry step by step guide to being a dark lord with a few funny ideas and a lot of padding. Its nothing like it. Its a genuine story with good characters, plot, and real humour. I read it while suffering from the dreaded lurgy and it did a good job of taking my mind off it. I'll definitely be buying the sequel.
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  • Aaron Winter
    3.0 out of 5 stars Good book, but the name is a bit misleading.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 10 October 2015
    Verified Purchase
    A fairly enjoyable book, a little disappointing that it adheres to the cliches instead of breaking them. With a name like the Dark Lords Handbook I was expecting something like the Evil Overlords handbook that took cliches and broke them. But the Handbook in the story actually tells the protagonist that these cliches are important and to do them. The book also ended with a sense of incompleteness and I was forced to buy the sequel in order to finish the story which should have been one book. Despite this it is a good story and worth a look.
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  • M T McGuire
    4.0 out of 5 stars Here's a big hand for Mr Dale - hopefully with more flesh on it though.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 10 June 2012
    Verified Purchase
    When I lived in London, I used the tube every day and pretty much every day, I would look at the bottle-shaped diagram on the wall of the train and reflect that Morden (which is at one end of the Northern Line) would be a great name for a baddy in a book. Sure enough it is.

    This book is great fun. There's a strain of subversive humour going on throughout which I really enjoyed but never at the expense of the characterisation. No typos that I noticed but some laugh out loud funny bits and a deftly handled sexual tension between our hero, or at least, our dark lord, Morden and the fundamentalist, mentalist, hero's potty-mouthed girlfriend. On the humour front, one particular chapter from the handbook about the dark lord rising and suddenly coming forth had me guffawing with Sid James like laughter. The book operates on more than one level though, with our own world situation intelligently parallelled.

    However, to me, and face it, this is all pretty subjective so take it with a pinch of salt - it does slightly rush to the end in the last chapters. The ending wasn't dissatisfying exactly but an awful lot happened rather suddenly in a short time and it didn't seem to connect as smoothly, or flow as seamlessly as what had gone before. And in the last pages, the sexual tension suddenly ceases to be an issue which sort of feels... odd. Undoubtedly, that has more to do with me than the quality of the writing, which was excellent throughout.

    So, I, for one, will be eagerly awaiting Paul Dale's next book and if you're looking for a funny, but thoughtful, read I thoroughly recommend this one.
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  • goosingpuck
    5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant read!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 21 August 2014
    Verified Purchase
    LOVED IT! I had no idea what to expect but was very happy with what I found. I thought it was a witty, smart, original look at the ultimate struggle between good and evil with great writing! I will definitely read it again and would definitely recommend!
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  • D. E. Rainger
    4.0 out of 5 stars We all know how these stories usually end
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 29 December 2013
    Verified Purchase
    And that is, just as the evil Dark Lord is about to step onto the winners podium, (and that includes the one who had a 'thing' about rings) along comes the Hero, who always manages to find that million to one target area and pulls off the shot that undoes tens, if not hundreds, of years of hard work.

    However, now it's Morden's turn. Young, hormonal and Master of the brooding look; and he has a handbook in his possession to help him. Unlike most, if not all of his predecessors, he is taking his time to not only read it, but to also take on-board what it is telling him.

    A Well written and witty first novel. Think Despicable Me meets Discworld. However don't see this story as yet another Discworld wannabe, it's far from it. It can be hard to differentiate to start with, as Paul Dale's writing style is not that different from Terry Pratchett's. Also, if you know your Discworld lore, you will see a number of nods of acknowledgment/respect towards Pratchett's works. But, you soon stop half expecting to see Discworld characters turning up, as the world created for Morden to rule asserts itself.

    I have not given this 5 stars, as there is some work still needed to be done by the author. In regards to tighten up on his writing style and prose. But all in all a damned good read which has left me waiting for another from him.
    One person found this helpful
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  • SAURABH MEHRA
    5.0 out of 5 stars EPICALLY AWESOME!!!'
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 27 September 2013
    Verified Purchase
    OMG I LOVE THIS BOOK SOOOOOO MUCH IT IS SO EPIC AND AWESOME AND JUST PLAIN COOL! Just wanna let the world know: I've ALWAYS found evil cooler than good, SO. Duh, my fav character is Morden but one question: in the end of the book, does Griselda or does she not like Morden??? I don't get it!
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Top reviews from other countries

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  • J
    5.0 out of 5 stars Funny and witty.
    Reviewed in Sweden on 2 July 2022
    Verified Purchase
    Good story, playing off of the old “good vs evil” fantasy standard.
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  • James Vernon
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fantasy and Humor make a great mix
    Reviewed in the United States on 2 August 2012
    Verified Purchase
    The Dark Lord's Handbook was a highly entertaining read that I had trouble putting down. The story follows the rise of the dark lord from humble beginnings to his growing power while following the handbook written by evil itself. At the same time, the story follows his predestined orphan hero opposition as he grows in power and esteem. Both characters were well developed and were supported by a great set of minor characters. The world where the story took place was well put together and interesting, which can be a difficult feat for a stand alone book.

    The overall story was a wonderful mix of fantasy and humor. The novel was full of your typical fantasy stereotypes; heroes, villains, dragons, and orcs. At the same time, the book was able to make fun of the usual good vs evil battle without coming off as insulting to fantasy enthusiasts. A great deal of the humor comes from the Dark Lord's Handbook in the story itself, which often makes humorous references to evil-doers in other well know stories.

    Overall I found the Dark Lord's Handbook to be a fun read that leaves you wanting more. The story is interesting, the characters are entertaining, and the humor is well played. A great book for anyone that is a fan of fantasy and also has a good sense of humor.
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  • LSE
    3.0 out of 5 stars Grundidee ist noch ausbaufaehig, koennte witziger sein, aber [a dark lord has no friends]
    Reviewed in Germany on 6 April 2015
    Verified Purchase
    + originelle, vielversprechende Grundidee und starker Beginn
    - flacht dann allerdings etwas ab: (Untote und Zombies, aber bis jetzt noch keine Vampire)
    + bevor die Story gegen Ende wieder Fahrt aufnimmt
    + es gibt nicht nur den Haupthelden sondern auch interessante Nebenrollen: vor allem die Orcs, der Kanzler und sein Sekretaer, die Anwaelte und die potentielle Dark Queen Griselda (Hans Moser wuerde sagen "a Goschn wie ein Schwert")
    + der Autor legt nicht nur Wert auf gute Charaktere sondern vernachlaessigt auch die Story nicht
    + am besten haben mir die Zitate aus dem Handbuch gefallen und wenn das Handbuch seine Vortraege haelt
    +/- wenn der Rest des Buches so gut und witzig wie die Einleitungszitate der 50 Kapitel waere, wuerde ich mehr als 3,5 Sterne vergeben
    + nette Anspielung auf Wirtschaftskrise nach Schneeballsystem im Fantasyland (schlimmer als a Dark Lord Rising und ein Held zusammen)
    +/- hat noch Potential, daher werde ich auch der Fortsetzung eine Chance geben
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  • duanne
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great book!
    Reviewed in Canada on 4 May 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Really liked the plot and overall story. Would have liked to have had a little more romance, felt a little weak.
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  • Barnesm
    5.0 out of 5 stars the delightful mirror to 'grimdark' fantasy
    Reviewed in Australia on 26 September 2018
    Verified Purchase
    With traditional fantasy, like Lord of the Rings, Songs of Fire and Ice and the like entering the popular culture the tropes of these stories, the noble hero of modest birth, the prophecy of the coming darkness and of course Dragons are now familiar enough to be subverted hilariously.

    This is what Paul Dale has achieved with his Dark Lord's handbook. A fast, funny undermining of the fantasy genre. If Joe Abercombie subverted the fantasy genre with his 'grimdark' then I guess Paul Dale is the flipside with 'joyfulsunny'.
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