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Steven Luna
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Joe Vampire (Joe Vampire Series Book 1) Kindle Edition

by Steven Luna (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.0 out of 5 stars 520 ratings
A real-life vampire whose tongue is as sharp as his teeth, and he's telling the world about Life Among the Undead. This might not be the smartest thing he's ever done...

Joe wasn't expecting to become a vampire. He was just hanging with friends at a sushi bar, putting his life back together after a break-up. But someone sucked on his neck - WITH THEIR TEETH - and threw him into an inconceivable situation that becomes more and more conceivable every minute. Now, he's on a roller coaster ride of strange and sometimes hilarious supernatural happenings. So he takes to the internet to tell the world what it's really like to transform into a real-life card-carrying Member of the Undead, in real-time. Sounds simple enough, right? Well, when his whole life shifts beneath him and he draws the attention of some menacing people who don't exactly love bloodsuckers, simple might not be so simple after all.

If you like vampire stories that blend heart and suspense with a generous helping of snarky, laugh-out-loud humor, you'll love the Joe Vampire Series.

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What Amazon readers are saying:

Laugh-out-loud blood-sucking good time!

Joe Vampire Kicks Ass! …more than any book I've read recently, I couldn't help but think “This should be a film.”

A vampire story with real heart. Joe Vampire is a tale about what makes us human.

The most fun reading I've had in a long time… It's genuinely fun. I found myself both caring about certain characters and loathing others.

Full-out unique entertainment… Thoroughly unique and readable…funny and entertaining from the get-go.

Awesome! Hilarious, exciting, and even a little sweet. I can't say enough good things about this book -- which all of you should buy immediately - and I can't wait for the next book from this author!

The most original take on vampires I've read in years.

Unique, modern, creative, and super entertaining... Joe Vampire is hands down my type of humor. Witty, quick, and laced in pop culture.

Funny as hell.

Everyman with a bite! An enjoyable read; a fresh take on the whole vampire genre.

Who knew a vampire would be so entertaining?! Funny, well written, page turner…I've woken up in the night to keep reading!

A most excellent read It's one of those rare books that will take you through a whole range of feelings along this journey…

I Heart Joe Vampire. His humour is fresh and witty and kept me laughing at some of his lines even after I stopped reading.

Witty and entertaining. Must read!

Hilarious!

Totally different…totally awesome!

I don't want that smart mouth to shut up! Luna gives it a lovely little twist near the end in a way I did not quite expect.

A vampire to love! Staggeringly clever and delicious throughout.

Great read - dont pass it up!

Not your average vampire tale! The sarcastic humor throughout the book just added to the story and helped Joe be even more relatable.

A snarky fun time! Such a cool twist on the vampire genre…written with great sarcasm and wit that made me laugh out loud, I find myself waiting (hopefully) for the next installment!
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  1. Book 1 of 3
    Joe Vampire Series
  2. Print length
    310 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Accessibility
    Learn more
  5. Publication date
    28 Jan. 2012
  6. File size
    1.7 MB
  7. Page Flip
    Enabled
  8. Word Wise
    Enabled
  9. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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 See full series
There are 3 books in this series.
This option includes 3 books.

Product description

About the Author

Steven Luna was relatively quiet when he was born, but that all changed once he learned to speak. Now? Good luck getting him to shut up. He's a lover of words, some of his favorites being "askew", "rhinoceros", and "plexiglas". He's written for children before, and now he's writing for adults. Someday he may write for the womb-bound or the elderly, but he'll need a little more convincing before he pulls the ripcord on that parachute. For now, he's hard at work on his next big novel...but it probably won't feature the word "plexiglas". "Askew" and "rhinoceros", however, are still on the table.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B00736WAZW
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Dapper Press
  • Accessibility ‏ : ‎ Learn more
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ 28 Jan. 2012
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 1.7 MB
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 310 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Book 1 of 3 ‏ : ‎ Joe Vampire Series
  • Customer reviews:
    4.0 out of 5 stars 520 ratings

About the author

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Steven Luna

Steven Luna

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Steven Luna invents people for the fun of it. He's the author of The Joe Vampire Saga, the Infinitum series, and the gothic fantasy Keepers, among others. He also illustrates books for children.

Customer reviews

4 out of 5 stars
520 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book enjoyable and well-written, with plenty of humor throughout. The story receives positive feedback for its quirky style, with one customer noting it's different from typical vampire narratives.

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8 customers mention ‘Enjoyment’8 positive0 negative

Customers find the book enjoyable and entertaining, with one customer noting it's a fun fast-paced read.

"...From the beginning it was a compelling read and I always wanted to read just one more page, one more chapter. I had a lot of late nights!..." Read more

"This offers a fun fast paced and most importantly a new slant on the whole boy-becomes-vampire story that has been done so often before...." Read more

"...I enjoyed reading this, the ups and downs, the disasters and the triumphs. I liked the simplicity of the story too, told in a down to earth way...." Read more

"...This is an enjoyable read neither wildly exciting or tedious but certainly amusing. Will enjoy seeing what happens in the next instalment." Read more

8 customers mention ‘Story quality’8 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the story's quirky nature, with one customer noting it has a different view of vampirism and another mentioning there are no ridiculous sparkly vampires.

"...It should. There were little surprises along the way, plenty of self deprecating wit from Joe, and a twist... well, I can't risk spoiling it...." Read more

"...You could almost believe the story, written as it is in the first person as a series of blog posts about what it's like to find yourself transformed..." Read more

"...I'm especially glad there were none of those ridiculous sparkly vampires and soppy, inconceivable love scenes. Thanks for that, Mr Luna." Read more

"It's good to see a different view point of vampirism and not the same myths regurgitated again...." Read more

5 customers mention ‘Humor’5 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the humor in the book, with one mentioning the self-deprecating wit from the main character Joe.

"...It should. There were little surprises along the way, plenty of self deprecating wit from Joe, and a twist... well, I can't risk spoiling it...." Read more

"...'s nothing too outrageously unbelievable in it and there's also plenty of humour. I liked it...." Read more

"...Guys love to talk about s***. The rest of the sense of humor in the book was quite OK, too. Some people love that kind of sarcasm and guy-sass...." Read more

"...The idea was a good one and there were flashes of humour that I liked (using the Dremel being one of them)...." Read more

3 customers mention ‘Writing quality’3 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing quality of the book.

"...Perfectly readable. And no, Joe was not a happy puppy to be a vampire. There wasn’t many things, in fact, that Joe could muster happiness for...." Read more

"...It's fun. It's well written. It's good. What more do you need from a book?..." Read more

"Entertaining and interesting read. Solid quality writing." Read more

Top reviews from United Kingdom

  • Tony James Slater
    5.0 out of 5 stars Joe Vampire Kicks Ass!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 14 November 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Man, I loved this book. Really, truly, loved it. I knew the author through Twitter, and I often worry about reading a book written by an acquaintance, in case I hate it and feel awkward about telling them. No fear of that here though! I thought the style was fast paced and amusingly snarky - it was Interview With The Vampire written for the digital age. And more than any book I've read recently, I couldn't help but think 'This should be a film'. It should. There were little surprises along the way, plenty of self deprecating wit from Joe, and a twist... well, I can't risk spoiling it. Suffice to say, what you expect at the start is not what you'll end up with! Joe is a funny, lonely, understandable, real human being - who just happens to become a vampire. Poor bastard! I felt quite sorry for him, and ended up wishing I had him as a mate. You will too. Buy it now!
    One person found this helpful
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  • Miss D M Reed
    4.0 out of 5 stars really rather good!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 21 February 2016
    Verified Purchase
    I came across this book accidentally and I'm glad I did. From the beginning it was a compelling read and I always wanted to read just one more page, one more chapter. I had a lot of late nights!
    The characters are believable and the ones we're supposed to like (Hube, Chloe, Louise, Amanda) were all likeable while not pretending to be perfect, while the baddies (Lazer, etc. No spoilers!) were sufficiently awful to be unlikeable while not being parodies of bad guys.
    The story flowed at a good pace and there was a good blend of tense moments and day to day living moments.
    You could almost believe the story, written as it is in the first person as a series of blog posts about what it's like to find yourself transformed into a vampire. There's nothing too outrageously unbelievable in it and there's also plenty of humour.
    I liked it. I'll be on the look out for any other books by this writer as his style is appealing and his work is well crafted.
    One person found this helpful
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  • Liis P
    3.0 out of 5 stars I really thought I was going to enjoy this vampire story so much because the premise of ...
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 13 February 2016
    Verified Purchase
    Now, I really thought I was going to enjoy this vampire story so much because the premise of it just sounded so backward and awkward and different. Just how like like things to be. And in all fairness, the writing was good. The idea was good and what little explosive did happen was just all right. I didn’t even mind the structure of the book being presented as Joe Vampire’s blog. Perfectly readable. And no, Joe was not a happy puppy to be a vampire. There wasn’t many things, in fact, that Joe could muster happiness for. We’re dealing with a beaten down, pessimistic, moaning Joe Vampire.

    I was a bit disappointed that something more exiting did not happen. It was a regular story of a guy going through life dealing with s***. To be honest- he came across like a real pussy. I swear, if he was my friend I would constantly keep telling him to cop on and get on with it. Yet, the occasional really funny lines kept me reading. It’s a book written by a guy and you can just get that guy-style right away. I mean, transition to vampirism through a nuclear diahrrea? Yup, it’s so totally a guy thing to have the need to draw parrallels with taking a dump. Guys love to talk about s***. The rest of the sense of humor in the book was quite OK, too. Some people love that kind of sarcasm and guy-sass. For me, it loses the awesomeness in heavy doses.

    In this book, the vampire is just like any human really but with a strange diet. They suffer from the feels, they still have to work to make money, they still look for love. And they don’t sparkle. To be honest, that “I’m a vampire but not the sparkling kind” is becoming a bit of a cliché. Yeah, yeah, Twlight was a big hit with a sparkling vampire and you don’t sparkle because you’re the real deal and you just need to get a dig in at Twilight. Whatever, get over it. The vampires in this book don’t seem to be struggling with overpowering need for human blood and don’t seem to ponder too much about the fact that they’re going to live for a very very long time. The issues and dramas are quite “in this moment”, quite normal human first world problems. Maybe that’s why it read slightly average. No really dramatic, strange, paranormal incidents. Well, there is a kidnapping, but …

    Ah, and I can’t write this review and not mention my favorite character- Bo. A southerner, just a bit thick but harmless and hard worker. He was my favorite character of the whole book and I wish he would have appeared a bit more often. In fact, I wish this book was about Bo, with Bo as the main character.

    Overall- it was an OK read. You need to try it out to test the level of humor- it might just be your cup of tea.
    3 people found this helpful
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  • Chris Wells
    5.0 out of 5 stars A new take on what is often an old and jaded genre.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 6 March 2017
    Verified Purchase
    This offers a fun fast paced and most importantly a new slant on the whole boy-becomes-vampire story that has been done so often before. Unlike those other stories though this isn't just a rehash of what went before. It's fun. It's well written. It's good. What more do you need from a book? Maybe vampire stories aren't your thing, they aren't generally mine, but this one works. Give it a go. I'll certainly be reading the others in the series.
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  • PJ Bookish
    4.0 out of 5 stars No sparkles!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 14 September 2016
    Verified Purchase
    Joe is such an understated guy, no mess, no fuss, simply telling it like it is.
    I enjoyed reading this, the ups and downs, the disasters and the triumphs. I liked the simplicity of the story too, told in a down to earth way.
    I'm especially glad there were none of those ridiculous sparkly vampires and soppy, inconceivable love scenes. Thanks for that, Mr Luna.
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  • Mr. Geoffrey Pollard
    5.0 out of 5 stars A vampire story with a twist.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 22 March 2017
    Verified Purchase
    This is a different kind of vampire story from the perspective of an ordinary bloke who has been infected and has to come to terms with the condition.
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  • Amazon Customer
    4.0 out of 5 stars A different view.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 20 January 2017
    Verified Purchase
    It's good to see a different view point of vampirism and not the same myths regurgitated again. This is an enjoyable read neither wildly exciting or tedious but certainly amusing.
    Will enjoy seeing what happens in the next instalment.
    Helpful
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  • Marcus Grant
    4.0 out of 5 stars Come here me moan.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 3 March 2016
    Verified Purchase
    In short it's a diary of a guy who has become very ill, and no one on earth understands it. He has to discover what he has, why, when and where...
    Once he has mourned his old live, he has to learn to live with what he has left. Not what he wished he had. On the plus side he has forever to get it right.
    So if you have ever had a long term illness with an ignorance level so huge... don't bother, you lived this journey. Walk away, nothing new here, just bad jokes, and awful music.
    If your British the humour is... Youg, stupid, male, geek. Doesn't really travel to well.
    Not sure about the blog style either, and shocked it's labeled book 1. Really!
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Star Platinum
    5.0 out of 5 stars Loved the series
    Reviewed in Australia on 17 February 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I couldn't stop talking about this to my friend who loves to read books. I finished the trilogy and it was great. Story was unique and Steven Luna is a wonderful storyteller. It's told from Joe's POV. Ordinarily, I would have been bored with the main character's musings, but it was captivating. I haven't read anything like Joe Vampire.
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  • Amazon Customer JK
    4.0 out of 5 stars The most relatable Vampire story ever, with lots of Laughs!
    Reviewed in Canada on 12 July 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Who knew that Vampires could be so much Fun? The most original Vampire story I've ever read. Follow Joe on his unintentional roller coaster ride of a life. A once average"Joe" is bitten by a drug dealing Vampire while on a failed" blind/group date" His struggle to keep his humanity and "Joe-ness" is chronicled on his blog as he also attempts to find the right girl, the right job, deal with his family, his band and his lifelong Best Friend.... It's original, heartwarming and laugh out loud funny.. It's an "everyman" story with a few major differences.
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  • Clayton
    5.0 out of 5 stars A Vampire Story with Real Heart
    Reviewed in the United States on 20 May 2014
    Verified Purchase
    The greatest trick Steven Luna ever pulled was convincing the world this was a book about vampires. And, of course, in oh-so-many ways, it is. But in a deeper, more potent level, Joe Vampire is a tale about what makes us human. Through a superb mixture of insightful reflection and blunt force wit, Luna has done something remarkable. The vampire's humanity that Anne Rice strives for in The Vampire Chronicles? He captures it perfectly and smartly in his modern tale of the supernatural everyman. Er, everyvam.

    Luna's style is similar to that of Jonathan Tropper. He somehow finds a way to really dig beneath the fingernails of everyday life and expose the dirt there, and his main character is open and honest without ever taking himself too seriously. There are some unabashedly thoughtful pearls of wisdom and self-reflection in this book that belong in the next edition of Bartlett's, and Luna does a tremendous job of balancing them out with quick, sharp bursts of hilarity, often in the same paragraph, sometimes in the same sentence.

    The story is structured as a series of excerpts from the main character's blog, which is a stroke of genius on the author's part. Not only does this vehicle make for some extremely interesting narration-play, but it also means that we are pretty literally taken along on Joe's vampiric journey, discovering things about his new reality just as he discovers them himself. We are never allowed to be too comfortable with what awaits him, because we never know what state he'll be in when we hear from him next.

    Luna channels the comedic timing of Mark Twain and the chutzpah of Philip Roth in this first installment of the Joe Vampire series and shows us how much more there is to the undead life than just glitter and glam.
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  • Chandan
    2.0 out of 5 stars Two Stars
    Reviewed in India on 19 March 2016
    Verified Purchase
    cud not finish
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  • BeastandHarlot
    4.0 out of 5 stars Joe Vampire
    Reviewed in the United States on 20 November 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Ha! This book had me cracking up.

    Joe starts a blog to talk about how he turned into a vampire, and what he is going through to adjust to this huge change in his life. He starts by letting us all know its not all sparkly and sexy.

    I really enjoyed this book, but there where a few times when it just seemed to drag a little to me (hence why only four stars). I would actually think to stop reading the book in general but then something would happen that would have me cracking up again so I would continue reading. But in the sense that life isn't going to be interesting all the time, I think pace is good. I really loved Joe, he goes through some really messed up stuff, but pulls through and continues on with his new half life. It was really nice to get a book that is not all about some sexy vampire roaming the night making women swoon with just a wink.

    The end of the book seemed a little "Happily Ever After" to me, but not enough to give me a tooth ache.

    Would I recommend this book? Yup! It was funny and real.
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