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Caddy Rowland
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Gastien: The Cost of the Dream: A Caddy Rowland Historical Family Saga/Drama (The Gastien Series Book 1) Kindle Edition

by Caddy Rowland (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
3.6 out of 5 stars 580 ratings
Gastien has dreams far bigger than a mere peasant has a right to. When he flees the farm for Paris, the late nineteenth century bohemian era is in full swing. Color has always called to him, beseeching him to capture it on canvas and show people a new way of seeing things. His father belittled his dream of being an artist and tried to beat him into giving it up. The dream wouldn't die, but Gastien would have had he not left.

He also yearns to become a great lover. After the years of anguish he has endured at the hand of his father, it would be heaven to feel pleasure instead of pain.

However, the city of Paris has a ruthless agenda. Unless a man has money and connections, Paris unfeelingly crushes dreams and destroys souls. With neither of the required assets, Gastien faces living in alleys, digging in trash bins for food, and sleeping where a man is often killed for his threadbare blanket.

Left with only his dreams, Gastien stubbornly pushes on. He vows that absolutely nothing will stop him, not yet realizing what keeping that vow might mean. Sometimes the "impossible" is possible - but the cost can be extremely high.

This historical fiction novel is book 1 of a 5 book drama/family saga for adults (The Gastien Series). As such, it contains adult themes and graphic scenes. Each book can stand on its own, but is most compelling read in order.

Historic people, places, events and things mentioned: Impressionism, bohemia, Acdémie Julian, bourgeois, Crémerie Restaurant Polidor, absinthe, hashish, L'Estaque, Le Procope, Montmartre, Notre Dame de Paris, artist, gentry, peasant
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  1. Book 1 of 5
    The Gastien Series #5
  2. Print length
    489 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Accessibility
    Learn more
  5. Publication date
    28 Sept. 2013
  6. File size
    1.7 MB
  7. Page Flip
    Enabled
  8. Word Wise
    Enabled
  9. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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There are 5 books in this series.

Product description

About the Author

Sign up for new book release information by copying and pasting this in your browser: http://eepurl.com/rfjaX Caddy Rowland grew up with a stack of books that almost reached the ceiling before she was five. Books, along with her vivid imagination, have always been some of her closest friends. She lives with her husband, who was her high school sweetheart. They are owned by two parrots. Besides being a writer, she is an artist. One can often find her "makin' love to the color" (painting) with loud music blaring. Her goal as an author is to make readers laugh, cry, think, and become intimately connected with her main characters. She writes dramatic novels showcasing the sublime joy and bitter tragedy of being human.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B005FI62BS
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ CFR Publishing
  • Accessibility ‏ : ‎ Learn more
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ 28 Sept. 2013
  • Edition ‏ : ‎ 2nd
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 1.7 MB
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 489 pages
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Book 1 of 5 ‏ : ‎ The Gastien Series #5
  • Customer reviews:
    3.6 out of 5 stars 580 ratings

About the author

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Caddy Rowland

Caddy Rowland

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The drama of humanity. We live, die, love, hate, win and lose in a never-ending variety of ways. Often those ways are heart-wrenching.

Why do people make the choices they do? Why do some abuse power? How do the powerless learn to survive? Why do a few dare to be different, while others conform--and why are so many disturbed by those who don't? These are the questions that have always haunted author Caddy Rowland. Those questions keep her pounding away at her keyboard, creating novels for adults who color outside the lines.

Caddy has always been a nonconformist. She likes to push the proverbial envelope when it comes to characterization and world building. Heroes have warts; villains have soft spots. Main characters don't always learn their lessons because all too often we don't, either. There isn't always a happy ending, but sometimes there is. Otherwise she'd be predictable.

She writes for readers who like to think and feel; who like their stories to be raw, graphic, unpredictable, "real" and sometimes brutal. For readers who like their boundaries challenged; to be shown how rarely life decisions are truly black and white, but instead shades of grey.

Think of a carnival midway with books instead of rides. She asks you make sure you're the minimum height if you plan on riding alone. You must also leave prejudices and inhibitions behind the entry gate. If you can't, Rowland's reads might be a tad much for you. Don't worry. There are plenty of safer reads out there. Just step out of the line and find a more appropriate book for your reading enjoyment.

No, Caddy Rowland's novels aren't for everyone. But then again, they just might be for you.

Sign up for new book release information by copying and pasting this in your browser: http://eepurl.com/rfjaX

Caddy Rowland also writes gay m/m romance under the name of Sibley Jackson.

Customer reviews

3.6 out of 5 stars
580 global ratings

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Top reviews from United Kingdom

  • Huw LaMort
    5.0 out of 5 stars J'adore!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 8 January 2015
    Verified Purchase
    I loved this story, sometimes funny, sometimes poignant, and sometimes horrific in its honesty of Gastien's life and why he makes the decisions he does. The honesty of the writer explaining why these decisions are made ring with sense and clarity- would I chose the same actions for security? As Gastien explains, unless you have lived through it, you will never know. I found this as a free ebook so I am new to the writer, but after this, I will be purchasing the other titles in this series. Well written, and thoroughly enjoyed.
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  • Book Addict
    4.0 out of 5 stars Bold, daring and emotional.
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 9 June 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Set in France toward the end of the 19th century, we follow the hero Gastien from childhood to adulthood. The eldest son of a peasant farmer who abuses his wife and beats his children, Gastien is singled out by his father for particularly harsh treatment because he dreams of becoming a painter. However, his father's brutality only spurs the young Gastien on, he leaves home for Paris where he ends up living rough on the streets until fate takes a hand and gives him a boost. Even then, when Gastien lands a plush job working for a rich man, yet more torment awaits as he is forced into selling more than his art work.
    "Gastien" is a compelling read, but be warned - it is not for the faint hearted. There are many adult themes here - from parental abuse to male rape, from starvation to masturbation - but if you are prepared for that then you wont want to put the book down. Don't be put off by this cautionary warning, to use a cliché - this book is like a fine wine, it matures with age! The more the story progressed the more the writing flowed and I just had to know what happened next. It is a bold, daring, emotional read shot through with flashes of greatness, and for anyone who wants a truly atmospheric read that evokes a time and place in all its gritty realism, you wont want to miss this book.
    Bravo Ms Rowland! When my nerves have recovered sufficiently I intend to complete the series. I was sorely torn as to whether to rate 'Gastien' a 4 or 5 - and award it a very honourable 4.5!
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  • Vincent Wardle
    3.0 out of 5 stars Three Stars
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 19 January 2015
    Verified Purchase
    Enjoyed the book,a little risked in parts,not everyone's cup of tea I suspect.
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  • Miss ScR
    1.0 out of 5 stars not my thing!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 19 March 2015
    Verified Purchase
    Pretty awful really but perhaps it just wasn't for me
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  • Florence
    5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 3 April 2016
    Verified Purchase
    Good read
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  • Mr. D. T. Eldridge
    2.0 out of 5 stars I became too annoyed with the fact that the book is written in ...
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 28 August 2014
    Verified Purchase
    I gave up after about 32%. I became too annoyed with the fact that the book is written in American English with, seemingly, very little research having been done into the Paris of the 1890's. For example, we have the hero bedding down beside a "dumpster" a term not used until 1936.
    6 people found this helpful
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  • Alex
    4.0 out of 5 stars Epic family saga
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 30 April 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Very interesting and captivating saga. Historical elements and drama weave very enjoyable reading and so looking forward what happens next.
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  • Katie
    5.0 out of 5 stars An emotional rollercoaster!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 30 September 2012
    *(I was given this in exchange for a honest review)*

    This book, by Caddy Rowland was one of the most emotional reads I have ever read. I am not a crier, I never cry, not watching sad movies, reading sad books, I am not a crier. Period. However, while reading this, I had experienced so many different emotions, that I had never thought possible while reading only one book! I was riding one of the most emotional rollercoasters! At times, I would cry as I felt for Gastien, and at other times throughout the story, I would smile and laugh.

    The story and plot was exciting, and I was eager to know what was going to happen next, what was going to happen to Gastien! The story flowed very well indeed, the characters were extremely well thought-out and just the amount of detail that was describing everything was amazing!

    I absolutely loved every second, even if at some points, my heart was breaking. I am so happy that Caddy Rowland let me review this book, and I am eagerly anticipating the next part! Thank you!
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Sandra
    4.0 out of 5 stars the story of Gastien's life should be a good read, although I personally wish that I hadn't ...
    Reviewed in Canada on 25 March 2015
    Verified Purchase
    I read this book because I wanted to know a little more about Paris and the trials and struggles that artists experience while trying to make a living. I had no idea that The Beginning would be so long and so explicit. Gastien's story is heartbreaking in so many ways, and there are some sections that I just could not read; however, the character is this story is interesting and, for those who can face the vividly portrayed sexual scenes described by this author, the story of Gastien's life should be a good read, although I personally wish that I hadn't started the series as the sexual scenes and language is not my style of reading. As this section of Gastien's "Beginning" ended, the author brilliantly led the reader into the first chapter of a new beginning for Gastien - From Dream to Destiny, and in this story of his life as a budding artist, Gastien meets Sophie - a beautiful and petite young waitress who will most likely steal Gastien's heart and maybe his freedom.
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  • Daghain Wolfe
    5.0 out of 5 stars Just like crack, the first one is free...
    Reviewed in the United States on 16 August 2015
    Verified Purchase
    Full disclosure: I got the first book free on Pixel of Ink. Oh, my God, I am SO happy I did. I loved it so much I bought the rest of the series and read it like I was going to die in the next ten days. These books are awesome.

    I'm going to try to confine myself to the first book of the series, but really, if you like this one, KEEP GOING.

    If you're not into graphic depictions of sex, this book is NOT for you. That said, it's not all about the sex.

    Rowland has managed to make her characters so much more than the physical. Gastien is a really amazing character and I can't imagine anyone not fighting in his corner.

    The writing is excellent, the characters are well developed, and, while I will say this first book in the series has its fits and starts, you REALLY need to keep reading, because I can tell you for sure, this family drama is well worth it. Rowland is awesome at blending world history into her story of Gastien's family tree, and you will totally enjoy it.

    I'm a sucker for generational fiction, and this delivers. I really can't say enough about this book, and the books that follow. A really, really good read. I cared a lot about these characters and I was emotionally invested right from the start.
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  • Little old lady from Iowa
    4.0 out of 5 stars Life on the streets in 19th century Paris
    Reviewed in the United States on 18 July 2014
    Verified Purchase
    Okay, this is not the type of book I usually read. While I like some romance, I tend to avoid bodice rippers because the writing leaves much to be desired. I got this as a free kindle book with no strings attached. I tried it and I liked it. It has decent writing and is a great story. The thing is I got started and it sucked me in and I could not put it down. It is told from a man's point of view. Sometimes it is a lot racier and graphic than my taste, but the story kept me reading. The story about a young man, abused by his father who always wanted to be an artist. When he got his chance he left home for Paris. There he suffered miserably from hunger and further abuse. He also had according to the narration of the book, an outstanding sex drive. I could have lived without most of the sex personally. However instead of making it all beautiful and sweet, the author makes you really see what it was like to live on the streets of Paris in the 19th century. There is no whitewashing in the story. I am pretty sure they offered it free on Kindle to get me hooked so I will read more of the series, which I haven't done yet. I will say there are a few anachronisms
    scattered through the story. But overall it didn't bother me.
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  • Gaele
    3.0 out of 5 stars the idea is one that could make a lovely and gripping story, it just needs more polish.
    Reviewed in the United States on 14 January 2014
    Verified Purchase
    A story set in the turn of the century, Gastien is an artist and part of the ‘forward thinking’ generation: obsessed with the arts, sexuality and the changes that are encompassing the entire world. Set as a family saga, the author’s plan is to release several books that circle this family and their dramas.

    So I was prepared for a more forward-thinking story in the historical fiction genre, and expected some of the sexuality and more ‘shocking’ (for the time) ideas to be presented. And often, the author manages to capture moments in the characters that feel very genuine. Gastien is self-absorbed, frustratingly so, and far too obsessed with his sexual conquests. With more than a few scenes that serve only to increase his sexual conquests, and do little to serve the plot: Gastien’s obsession with his sexual prowess and attractions to both men and women are wearing and while you often can hope he will find something permanent and real, they all begin to flow together and lose impact.

    There are scenes of considerable dubious consent, and several moments where the author has expended far more effort in analyzing his psyche than was necessary: we have seen the missing pieces in Gastien’s psyche, we have a clear path to follow his intentions. This frequent insertion of information only served to halt the forward motion of the plot, and left this reader frustrated.

    Secondary characters are introduced rapidly, although none seem to be developed in a way that would present their appearance as necessary or impacting the storyline, and sadly, most are forgettable.

    I was reading an historical, and while the author goes to great lengths to explore and explain her reasoning for the dialogue misses and inclusion of phrases with meanings far advanced of the age, that was a huge miss for me: I understand the choice, I didn’t like it and I didn’t find that words like Okay and Gig served to enhance the “forward thinking” feel that was sought. There was promise in the story and even in the writing, it just needed another round of edits to tighten the plot, enhance and develop characters other than Gastien, and balance the pacing. There were some beautiful moments, and some lovely descriptions despite all of these issues: the idea is one that could make a lovely and gripping story, it just needs more polish.

    I purchased a copy of the title for my own library prior to having the opportunity to read this title as part of France Book Tours. I was not compensated for this review: all conclusions are my own responsibility.
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  • Amanda K
    1.0 out of 5 stars Not great and stopped reading within 40 pages
    Reviewed in the United States on 5 June 2014
    Verified Purchase
    The first chapter of the book, while not very polished, does set up an interesting plot line.

    However, the interest is soon drowned in the choppy writing, shallow characters, and awkward narration. It was hard to follow Gastien's train of thought when the narration switched from third to first person in the middle of paragraphs without any kind of typographic marking.

    There is also a ton of flashback that drags down that plot line.

    Save your time and pick out something else to read.
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